Category: Romance and Relationships
I wish I could create a handbook on ME that would better explain to another HOW and WHY I feel a certain way about certain situations or individuals along my path of life. I feel so misunderstood a lot of the times. I don’t know if it would have been easier for all of the human race if God would have given a handbook to each one of us at birth that would explain us thoroughly throughout the entirety of our lifetime that would update daily with our growth that we would be able to make copies of and distribute, when needed, to all of the people that misunderstand us along our way of growth. You could have an index that would make it so easy to figure out like Chapter 1. Romance and Love; Chapter 2. Family; Chapter 3. Friends and Friendships; Chapter 4. Pet Peeves; Chapter 5: Growth from Specific Pains; Chapter 6: What not to do; Chapter 7: MY True Happiness, etc. What a LARGE handbook I would have. I sometimes wish I wasn’t so vocal about the way I feel but I don’t understand what justice that does anybody if I ALWAYS bottle up what I feel about you or you in my life. Wouldn’t you rather know? I feel like I’m bein’ fake if I don’t let you know how I’m feeling if it is something that bothers me and then when you and I are interacting I’m actin’ like everything is kosher when it’s not. I often time feel that it is detriment to my growth with some people in my life. I just hate to harbor things that weigh on my chest so heavy. I feel like I can’t breathe until I get it out into the open with whatever or whoever it has to deal with or it’ll just drag me down from constantly thinkin’ about it. I feel like even when I try to explain why I am feeling a certain way about something or someone that I just can’t get it through that persons dome piece and then I feel like I walk away from the situation confused, hopeless, and frustrated and then in turn leave the other person confused, frustrated, and irritated with me. A dear person in my life says to me often "you say you know what you would do in that situation, but you don’t really know until your in those shoes" and he is so right, So maybe that is the solution to people misunderstanding ME. Take a walk in my shoes and feel what I feel and then maybe you’ll comprehend my feelings. I guess since I know that isn’t possible I should just either get used to being misunderstood or maybe my silence would do the trick BUT I refuse to give up my freedom of speech, as it is my release a lot of the times, so I suppose that leaves me with being misunderstood. How frustrating. Please know when I come to you about what I feel it is not my intention to ever leave you furious or upset with me but ONLY to find a resolution that is suitable for the situation or to be there for you if that is possible.
Friday, March 14, 2008
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
15 Random Things
Category: Life
OK, what ya do is, list 15 random things about you.
1. I LOVE walks in the park!
2. Even though I feel I had D.J. (my son) WAY too early in my life it happened for a reason and I wouldn’t take it back for anything.
3. I absolutely can’t STAND FAKE people! What’s the point?!?!?
4. Anytime I see a homeless person, elderly person that looks helpless, or handicapped person I literally have an urge to cry because my heart goes out to them and if I had more money I would shelter them all and gather a program that could try to get the homeless back on their feet and the elderly and handicapped people healthy as much as possible to create a more amicable and easy life because I have a big heart.
5. I don’t like to reveal my weakness’ at ANY time. I do admit that I have always struggled to defeat the weakness of yearning for a companion all the time.
6. When I eat, I only eat one thing at a time on my plate and I won’t mix things together and I usually leave the meat of the entree for last.....kind of like my FINALE! lol
7. I secretly get pissed when someone sees my first and last name and assumes that my last name is my first or they mispronounce my first name. It’s either BERACHAH or MS. PAYTON. Sheesh!
8. I have ALWAYS been blonde and NEVER dyed my hair past highlighting my blondeness. lol
9. I think everybodies feet (don’t care how cute they are) including my own are GROSS.
10. I have NEVER been in a physical altercation in my life but I’M SURE I would WHOOP UP ON some tail if anybody ever decides to get bold and throw any fists my way.
11. I am scared to no end to be in any swimming pool by myself.
12. I don’t believe in the phrase "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" because I’m not bout to be fake and act like everything is copacetic when your around if you are an "enemy" in my eyes.......it is what it is......I ain’t tryin’ to talk to you and don’t feel it to be beneficial to me anyways.
13. I don’t like to walk around bare foot and especially not on concrete, dry wood, or dirt.
14. I think I sometimes forget to address my issues and emotions because as much as I enjoy being the confidant and solid rock to most, sometimes all the advice given and issues and information received from others take precedence over my own.
15. I am a UofL Cardinal fan! GO CARDS!!!!!!!!!
OK, what ya do is, list 15 random things about you.
1. I LOVE walks in the park!
2. Even though I feel I had D.J. (my son) WAY too early in my life it happened for a reason and I wouldn’t take it back for anything.
3. I absolutely can’t STAND FAKE people! What’s the point?!?!?
4. Anytime I see a homeless person, elderly person that looks helpless, or handicapped person I literally have an urge to cry because my heart goes out to them and if I had more money I would shelter them all and gather a program that could try to get the homeless back on their feet and the elderly and handicapped people healthy as much as possible to create a more amicable and easy life because I have a big heart.
5. I don’t like to reveal my weakness’ at ANY time. I do admit that I have always struggled to defeat the weakness of yearning for a companion all the time.
6. When I eat, I only eat one thing at a time on my plate and I won’t mix things together and I usually leave the meat of the entree for last.....kind of like my FINALE! lol
7. I secretly get pissed when someone sees my first and last name and assumes that my last name is my first or they mispronounce my first name. It’s either BERACHAH or MS. PAYTON. Sheesh!
8. I have ALWAYS been blonde and NEVER dyed my hair past highlighting my blondeness. lol
9. I think everybodies feet (don’t care how cute they are) including my own are GROSS.
10. I have NEVER been in a physical altercation in my life but I’M SURE I would WHOOP UP ON some tail if anybody ever decides to get bold and throw any fists my way.
11. I am scared to no end to be in any swimming pool by myself.
12. I don’t believe in the phrase "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" because I’m not bout to be fake and act like everything is copacetic when your around if you are an "enemy" in my eyes.......it is what it is......I ain’t tryin’ to talk to you and don’t feel it to be beneficial to me anyways.
13. I don’t like to walk around bare foot and especially not on concrete, dry wood, or dirt.
14. I think I sometimes forget to address my issues and emotions because as much as I enjoy being the confidant and solid rock to most, sometimes all the advice given and issues and information received from others take precedence over my own.
15. I am a UofL Cardinal fan! GO CARDS!!!!!!!!!
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