Don't hate the messenger!

First off let me start off by saying that if you don't do triflin' things then people wouldn't have a reason to be suspicious about you and/or make stories up about you that it is possible other people COULD believe...........refer back to my "what are you notorious for?" blog for further clarification. Secondly, it baffles me that certain people always feel the need to get mad at the messenger.......hate the messenger.......call the messenger a "hater"........when their DIRTY business gets put out on front street.......when their lies are unveiled.......when their poor decisions affect the people they SUPPOSEDLY care about. I've said time and time again that the grape vine is in constant motion. Staying OUT of the grape vine is about an impossible task. It's the things that you do that go into the grape vine.........negative or positive......but it is the negative that typically moves through the grape vine quicker. The more people you know the more grape vine ya get. If I hear some horrible information or news that has to do with you doin' a FRIEND OF MINE dirty......then I'mma be the first to absorb the information.......take careful notes......question my source(s).........question the information, and if it sounds in or out of character of the offender. If I feel it SEEMS to be valid based on that process of thinking then yeah I'm gonna tell my friend. I don't LIKE to be provided with horrible information about something that could affect my friend(s). Often times I can't stand it actually because then I've got to go through this thought process........when and how I'm gonna tell my friend.......and yes.......I'm gonna tell my friend, as I would expect he or she to do the same for me if the roles were reversed. Who am I to deny my friend information that could possibly have an adverse effect on their life? I know the number one question I always get is "who told you?" and the number one thing people hate to hear from me when I provide information is "I don't reveal my sources." I don't reveal my sources because I check my sources and it doesn't matter who the information comes from in my opinion.........if you did the dirt.......YOU DID THE DIRT......it then becomes your fault that you had a leak in your pool and your dirt is now out for those to hear about. Do you people honestly think that I like to hear messed up crap that you are doin' to my friend? Would you hold it in if it was YOUR friend? DOUBT IT! I hate that their is even the possibility of people doin' my friend(s) wrong but it is what it is. I'm a REAL FRIEND so EXPECT if I hear some jacked up stuff you've done and I feel it's valid then I'm gonna be a "hater" and I'm gonna disclose "it could or could not be valid information, but I thought you should know" after every time........it is then my friends turn to do as they please with the situation/information. I DON'T BENEFIT from hearing your dirty business! It is actually a burden to me because I have to face my friend(s) to tell them crappy news that more than likely is gonna hurt them in some way. So you can call me a "hater" ALL DAY LONG if it makes YOU feel better about your dirty business, but know that I don't benefit from it, I don't like it, and I don't do it for selfish reasons......I do it to protect the people I care about and love and that's it. You can't hate the messenger for hearing the information! You either hate yourself for doing the dirty business OR you hate the person that fabricated the story that made it into the grape vine for me to hear because I sure as hell am not the one fabricatin' stories just so I can hate on you.......be real......I have much more important things to do and problems of my own to deal with. GROW UP!!!!!!!!!! For the record.......I commend and appreciate those unselfish and genuine messengers that relay information to protect ones they care about and love. PROPS TO THE LEGITIMATE "HATERS"!

Hard feeling safe in my home now.....

So on Friday night I went about having a normal night as I usually do. While I was away from my home, leaving it locked and secured as usual, it was broken into. The individual(s) who broke in attempted to come in through a window but being unsuccessful, because of it being securely locked, they decided to use excessive force and kick through my front door that had both a deadbolt lock and lock on the knob. When I got home around 4:45 AM I walked in the house as usual and once I walked into my livingroom......my heart fell to the floor and I was instantly hit with shock and fear of the realization that my home, which to me is my safe haven, had been invaded by someone..........my privacy and security compromised. Once fear had been forced on me I proceeded to the kitchen and grabbed the sharpest and biggest knife I owned and called a friend to stay on the phone with me as I walked around shaking trying to make sure the perpetrator was not still in my home. As I'm walking around scared out of my mind, I observe that the individual(s) proceeded to go through my personal items throughout my home. Still unsure of what they were looking for exactly because after thorough checking I found that out of all the valuable items they could have taken, all they stole were a few FAKE rings out of my jewelry box. I called for a police officer to come out and check the house and I made a report of my findings. The officer informed me that a burglary had also been committed at another home that same night just one street over from mine. After the officer came and went I was still filled with so much fear. I slept gripping that knife in my hand as I tried to sleep that night. I have since slept with that knife close enough to me just in case. I cannot explain in words how scared I was and still am........it's horrifying to think that even though I prepare my home to be as secure as possible, that my safety, security, and privacy can still be violated. It is a horrible feeling........almost makes you feel like no matter what you do to secure your safe haven that a thief will make his way into your home somehow if he or she so decides. I have slept in fear since then and I can only pray that it doesn't happen again. I was thankful that the perpetrator only stole the few things of no value, and that me and my son were not home at the time it happened. I'm calling this week about getting an alarm system placed in my home in hopes that it will further secure my safe haven and keep future situations from arising.

Have to OR Choose to?

I don't want or deserve a man that feels he HAS to do everything in his power to make me happy, but a man that wants to CHOOSE to do everything in his power to make me happy. Know this........I refuse to settle for anything less than a MAN that chooses.

What are you notorious for?

Question of the day: What are you notorious for? What are things in your life that people around you can always seem to predict you will end up doing because you have made yourself known for it? Are the things you are notorious for doing, good or bad? Most all of us are notorious for at least one thing. I ended up finding out some unfortunate information about two "friends" of mine of something done behind my back. As I was naturally pissed off about it........the unfortunate thing is that even though it was most definitely triflin' ......I didn't put it past one of them based on what I had heard one of the "friends" was notorious for doing and the vibe I felt in general. After I spoke my peace about the situation to both of them I decided to take a look at myself in regards to what I'm notorious for doing and I must say I think, generally speakin', I am not notorious for bad things and hope nobody feels that I am. I know that nobody is perfect but if you are notorious for doin' bad things to people that you "care about" and feel the need to claim "nobody's perfect" each time you wrong somebody, then you may want to take a look at yourself inside because even though I agree that nobody's perfect, I don't ever want to repeatedly hurt people that I care about and love and always feel like I can play the "nobody's perfect" card because you can only wrong someone in the same way so many times before they just stop believin' in you and trustin' that you won't continue doin' them wrong. Moral of this blog is take a look at yourself and REALLY think about it and try to figure out what you are notorious for, and ask yourself ......are the thing(s) you are notorious for tend to hurt others around you? If you are notorious for hurting the ones you "love" or "care" about in whatever way it may be, don't you think that changing that bad habit would be beneficial to you and the relationships/friendships in your life?